My $.02
I'm tired of politics in
everything. I understand that in society we have to present things in
certain ways, but sometimes we really go overboard and it winds up
causing problems. Some people say that adhering to antiquated and
impractical social constraints is a sign of respect. I think it's just
the opposite. It is usually just socially convenient to spare people's
feelings and avoid potential conflict. If you don't care enough about
somebody to speak plainly and truthfully, how is that showing them
respect? Mincing words to avoid hurting someone's feelings doesn't
show respect, it shows that either you don't believe that person can
handle the truth or you don't want to have to bother yourself
explaining your point of view. It shows that you think they are either
too dumb or delicate to deal with it, and usually ends up with that
person making bad decisions because they didn't have all the
information they needed.
Tell me again how that's respectful?
I may hurt people's feelings sometimes, but that is never the goal.
The true show of respect and caring is expressing my opinion (when
asked, of course) so they have as much information as possible. In the
long term, preserving temporary feelings is not important. Giving
people honest feedback so they don't make bad decisions you could have
helped them avoid is what matters. If you really feel you have to go
out of your way to be polite, here's a way to do it. Take off your
hat, tell someone that their idea is the stupidest thing you ever
heard, then follow it up with a deep, flourishing bow. There. You've
covered all the bases, and they don't sink their life savings into a
"Jump to Conclusions" mat.
Chuck
Have an opinion? I'd like to
hear it - even if you're wrong :-) . Drop
me a comment on the Contact Me page.
Copyright
2005 Chuck Herrin.
